many

many months later and many things have changed again. really just one big thing. gareth and i broke up. it just wasn't working anymore. i guess he wanted to make it work but i didn't. so i called it quits. i'm sad it's over. it wasn't all bad. it just wasn't good anymore. that was actually a few months ago and he's moving out this weekend. i've been looking for a roommate to move in with me with no luck so far. hopefully that will happen soon. i'm fortunate enough to have my parents helping a lot but even with their help i can't afford my place alone. that actually happened just before school started. school's going well and i'm doing well but it's a lot of work. i haven't had a full school schedule in many years. enough time to forget just how much work it is. i also got a new job about a month before school started. it's at caring hands with my friend that left a little while before me. we're both vet assistants there and are enjoying it a lot more than where we were. all these changes, though heading in the direction i want and better than before, have been a lot to handle. i've developed an eye twich. that's about the only outward showing of my stress. i think i handle it pretty well. it's felt like winter for the past week. i do love the cold but hope we get more of a fall to enjoy the transition. i'm hoping to head to the mountains with my friend later this month if we can work our schedules out. i haven't been horseback riding in over a month. i don't really have the time and am afraid i won't have the money if i spend it on not necessary things. so life hasn't been too exciting outside of work and school. i have a dog-sitter now. another former coworker. he comes when he can when i need him. the pups and i are lucky. i'm gone long hours a few days a week and with gareth leaving there won't be anyone around to take them out. i'm happy the house won't be completely empty...

changes

i've landed back here after a few months. some things have happened i'd like to share with whoever reads this and document for myself to look back at. gareth got a job a couple months ago. it's a good job with regular hours. not exactly what he thought he'd be doing but i don't think he really knew what he wanted to do anyways. so he's happy with this. we got a new dog a little while ago too. her name is chloe. she came through my work as the mother of ten puppies who were all in a court case for about a month and i fell for her. introduced her to colby and they became buddies so we took her home to foster and possibly adopt. we quickly decided to adopt and she's now a part of our family. i got into the vet tech program and classes start in about two months. i'm going down to part time just before that. i'm looking forward to doing less work and more learning. in the meantime i've been doing all the work to get my loan and supplies. i've gone on the road with the large animal ambulatory service a couple times now and seen some interesting things. i've been taking horseback riding lessons for a few months now. getting better but still nowhere near where i used to be. don't really know where i want to go with it but i'm having fun jumping again. i've been hanging out with the girl who's horse at my barn had surgery. the horse is doing very well now. the girl actually quit working at my clinic but got a new job that seems very promising. we've been running at the battlefield with our dogs. it's been nice to get out with someone with similar interests. i'm going to try to get a bike soon. looking forward to the rest of my summer here. we got another year at our place. i'm happy about that staying the same and some of the things above that have changed : ]

about

this has been the most lovely spring i can remember in some time. i've been taking lots of pics of the beautiful tree with pink blossoms turned to red leaves and yellow tulips a previous tenant planted with the promise of my daffodils coming up and some bushes about to bloom. we've been enjoying our walks in the neighborhood with all kinds of trees coming to life with purple and white flowers and leaves with so many shapes and shades. wow. it's been beautiful. i'm sad to think we'll most likely be leaving after our year's rent is up. i have no idea to where. gareth says he has a job in the works but won't tell me what it is and says don't worry about it when i ask what it might be. but i do worry. i can't afford to live on my own or support the two of us. especially since i'll be part time come fall when school starts. and his parents are pretty tapped with everything going on with his mom. so i have no idea what will happen but i'll enjoy our lovely home for now. and try not to freak out about the future. i finished my class with an a. glad to have some free time now to read non-text books and relax a little. i went out to a new farm with the girl i went trail riding with from work. the lady let us ride her horses in exchange for taking care of them. just grooming them and cleaning up around the barn a little. one of the horses i rode is a draft horse and we both got to ride this gigantic creature bareback. that was interesting. it was fun and nice to get out and dirty for a day. i'm looking forward to more outdoor adventures.

out

there's been a lot going on again but it hasn't all been bad. we've had some summer weather come through and spring is in full bloom. dad got me a hammock stand and i was able to put up the hammock that was won and given to me at my brother's fundraiser last year. i've had a few chances to lounge in it and am looking forward to the rest of my three day weekend to do more of just that. gareth and i took a trip to dc with my niece and her boyfriend last week. it was a beautiful day out to walk around and see the monuments. she'd never been to the holocaust museum so that was a downer to the day but an important eyeopener. especially at the end where it showed genocide happening in the world today. humankind can be so horrible. colby's had another poo crisis. he was constipated for a few days and not drinking. he got dehydrated and needed sub q fluids. then he got his first enema. solved the stopped up situation but gave him diarrhea. he's getting better on that end now. i got to spend a day out at the farm with my friend and her horse before she got the horse's tumor removed. the surgery went well and hopefully recovery will continue to go well. i'm hoping to finish my class this weekend. i took a test this week and got another a. i just have one quiz left to take at home and the final at school. i talked to the financial aid office and since i already have a bachelor's degree i won't qualify for any grants but i will get loans at a very high intrest rate. gareth's been helping at his friends' play for the past few weeks. he's a stagehand and seems to be enjoying what he's doing. so i don't see as much of him as i used to but more than when he worked. hopefully he'll find something where he's paid and still around some. now to get out and enjoy this beautiful weather.

a long

i'm happy to say that february's finally over. it was an extra long one this year. with even more fecal after i last wrote. gareth lost his job. they said his work just wasn't good enough. it was pretty horrible news. but after a minor mourning on his part he's back out there looking. and i'm happy to see more of him here. hopefully this will all have been for a reason and there will be something great around the bend. this will be my tenth day working in a row before having the weekend off. i was talking about everything going on and that i had to make the trip out to louisa before work one of these days and the girls actually let me leave early to do it the other night. only one of my tires ended up needing replacing. but i got all four and new rear breaks for less than $300. woohoo. it's ready to go but we'll wait until sunday to go hang out at my nephew's bday. and perhaps make it home in time and with energy for ice skating? i went on a trail ride with another girl from work last weekend. it was expensive but fun. especially getting to canter for the first time in a long time. with everything going on i've gotten a little behind in my class. but it's go at your own pace so i should have time to catch up by the end. i have exactly a month. hopefully it will be a better one : ]

a lot

it's weird writing things in facebook. just sending out random thoughts for all to see. i'm enjoying sharing my pics with an audience and seeing their comments. but there's some things that just can't be said with pics and i don't know how to write them. i guess i'm better in blog mostly because i don't think many will read. but i like looking back on what was going on in my life and my thoughts on it. right now there's a lot going on and my thoughts aren't the best. my car failed inspection for (with correct math) what would be over $1,800 to fix. but i talked to my sister and brother in law in louisa and they think i'm being ripped off and have offered to help. thank god for family. i have no idea when i'll have the time to get it out there but it'll be worth it. i had a few days off and got caught up with everything that's been piling up. gareth's been working 60-70 hours every week since he started (almost a month now). so that's been hard on us. especially him. especially after learning his mom has cancer. she just had surgery for the tumor in her colon. but it's in her lungs too. so that's pretty devastating. he's barely been able to see her either. don't know what else to say about that. i sent in my application for the vet tech program again. it was a lot easier this time with them already having my transcripts and no observation hours needed. hopefully i'll get in now with chemistry completed. i've been taking a math course online. it's pretty easy and so far i've been getting good grades. kitt and colby both had a bout of diarrhea the beginning of the month. kitt's cleared up quickly without treatment but colby's was pretty bad until he got some antibiotics in his system. he couldn't hold it overnight or while i was at work so i had multiple messes and started bringing him to work with me. he's all better now. after all that i decided to get kitt checked out more thoroughly and had bloodwork and a urinalysis done. it indicates she has the beginning of kidney disease. which is understandable at her age. i'm debating taking the doctor's advice and having a dental done or not. there's downsides to either choice and i'm just trying to make the best one. the horse i was riding with the girl from work has a tumor in her leg. they just found it and she asked me to come see them aspirate it the other day. it was interesting and i even got to give the horse two shots. hopefully it's benign and they won't have to remove it. that's what happened to my horse. she had a tumor in her chest that just started growing one day. they said she'd have to be put down so i stopped going out. i couldn't be there for that. still makes me sad. i found some old pics and scanned them in to share. still makes me happy. my back started hurting really bad last week and i had some sort of back spasam at work. this was right after i was tattled on for talking to the girl with the horse about all our medical issues going on with our people and pets. it was all too much and i had a minor breakdown. not everyone at work is terrible but the ones that are really make it suck sometimes. i just realized how nice it it outside and decided colby and i need some sunshine before i'm stuck at work the rest of the day. i finally planted the bulbs mom gave me last fall. they're only under about an inch of mulch and dirt but maybe i'll have some flowers come spring. i think this is everything that's been going on lately. it's not all bad but it's a lot to deal with. especially with gareth not being around. hopefully everything will work out. i'm looking forward to the spring here. i don't know if gareth realizes how much i enjoy our home and especially our yard here. i hope he does before absolutely insisting we move into the city where we'll have a lot less for a lot more. but that's a thought for another day...